Time

I keep putting off writing because I tell myself that I am tired, busy, blocked, hungry, etc. I thought about a quote this week that I had come across a while ago. Kind of put me in my place.

"Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein."
--H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I may not have the talent or the gifts that this group of people had, but I do have the same amount of time in a day. What it comes down to is discipline. Get up earlier, turn off the TV, force myself to do what needs to be done. It is so easy to just make excuses about not being able to do the things that I would like to do.

What are you not doing that you feel you should be doing? Why are you not doing it? It is not about working yourself into a state of burnout, but it's about using the gifts you (and I) have been given.

Peace.

The Greatest

I know I said I was not going to write about family as influences in my life because that seems to be a given. With this post, I have officially lied.

I got to go away this past weekend to Myrtle Beach with my wife. When you have kids, it is very easy to lose sight of the husband and wife part of the family. It isn't that you forget about being married, it is just so often swamped under everything else that goes on in life. Jobs, friends, soccer practice, bible study, church, dance classes, soccer games, trips to the beach, bills, broken stuff, facebook, writing... You get the idea.

Anyway, I was reminded again why I married this woman. Words cannot do justice to her spirit, her creativity, her love, her laugh, her dreams, her talents, her strength or her life. I often joke about how she threw herself at me because of the Lademann curse (women can't help themselves), but the truth is that I consider myself the most blessed man on the planet to have this woman as such an intimate part of my life.

Rachel, I love you and you are, after God, the greatest influence in my life; the reason I do anything that I do for good. Thank you for loving me.

Peace.

Eugene Peterson

Unlike the previous influences I have written about, this one has no direct connection to my life.

Eugene Peterson is a man that I have never met. I think I have only heard him speak one time and that was on a podcast. He is almost 40 years older than I am. He is brilliant. I am, well...not brilliant.

His books, though, have had a profound influence on the way I see people and the way I want to live my life. He was a pastor at the same church for 29 years. His views on pastoral work go back to the foundation of going through life with people. It is not glamorous. It is not easy. But it is the way a pastor should function.

Sometimes it is difficult to discern whether Peterson is a pastor first and then a writer or if it is the other way around. That is not to say that one area is more important to him or that he is better at one than the other. It means that he loves people and helping them see God in life. He does a great job of communicating that love through the written word.

The way that Eugene Peterson has affected me the most is in helping me see this life as a story, God's story. We have our own, personal stories that are a part of the collective story that God is telling throughout history. I see people now and wonder "What is their story?". I am constantly amazed by what people do, what they have been through and what dreams they have tucked away.

Peterson has caused me to see the story of life and to love it. He has shown me that we are called to love people, in spite of their junk, and show them Jesus. He has shown me the importance of prayer and down time as a pastor. His view of pastoral work is grounded in an organic reality of God's work, not in the business of church. He has inspired me to read classic literature and observe what those writers have seen of life.

Eugene Peterson is that guy, for me, that I will try to read everything that he has written. If I had to pick a favorite, it would have to be "Tell It Slant", which is his latest book and the one I am in the middle of right now. If you are looking to start reading Peterson, pick up "Leap Over A Wall", which is a study on the life of David.

Peace.

Unknown

On our honeymoon, Rachel and I went whitewater rafting. We were in a raft with one other man and his young son. The kid had a hard time sitting still and he nearly took out my new bride's teeth with his paddle at one point. I debated the morality of a pastor baptizing a child by knocking him out of an inflatable raft into a raging river. My practical side prevailed and the boy finished the run down the Nantahala safely in the raft.

Anyway, his father has had a profound impact on my life and I don't even know the man's name. We had a conversation while traveling down the river and he discovered that I was a youth pastor. He was Methodist or Presbyterian or something so we talked a bit around church and God and the like. When we arrived at our destination, I shook his hand, said nice to meet you and fully expected to never see him again. He had already walked out of sight and I had moved on to the next thing when he returned and walked straight to me.

This man, whom I had known for only a couple of hours, said something that has stuck with me to this day. Almost 12 years later I can clearly remember his words.

"Believe God and do what you want to do."

These words have played a part in carrying me halfway across the country to start a church. They continually inspire me to be stretched. This small statement helps me to make God bigger in my everyday life.

Influence can often come from places that we don't expect. Pay attention.

Peace.

3 Boys to Men

Let's be honest. Men are not typically known for having deep relationships. Most of the time, sports, women and alcohol (though not necessarily in that order) can serve as the basis for a long time friendship among guys. We are taught to "man up", don't let anyone in and get through life on the strength we have in our self. Sometimes that works. For about ten minutes.

In thinking about the influences in my life, friends have definitely played a big role. Over the years, from elementary school through to college and beyond, many people have filled that friendship spot, some better than others. Specifically though, there have been three that have stood the test of time.

I met Brett, Joe and Shannon when I was a freshman in high school and we were all clueless, mullet-wearing, collections of rampant hormones. (They may claim they didn't have mullets, but it was the '80's and everyone had a mullet.) Our friendships have weathered the highs and lows that come to any relationship. They have survived the occasional differences over who saw the girl first and who did she look at. Physical distances may have made the conversations a little less regular but, after more than twenty years, the friendships are still standing strong.

These three guys have been the go-to in the clutch people for me for a long time. The late night conversations about God, life and everything else have done as much to shape my thinking as just about anything I have experienced. Whether it be in agreement or disagreement, the foundation stays strong. Regardless of how long it has been since we have all been in the same room at the same time, we pick up right where we left off.

I realize that this kind of friendship is rare and that I am blessed to have had these three men be a part of shaping my life over the years. I am grateful for the roles they have played and I am honored that one is now literally part of my family (brother-in-law--which makes me question his motives for being my friend in the first place!). All that brings me to this place...Thank you my brothers.

Peace.

Obviously

I feel that I need to clarify one thing before I embark on this series of posts on the influences on my life.

My family, like yours I'm sure, has had the greatest influence on my life. Because of the amount of time we spend with those in our immediate family, for better or for worse, they will be among the most profound influencers of just about anyone's life. That is just the way it is. Things that your parents or siblings or grandparents or cousins or any other relative do or say often have the greatest impact.

I understand that and though I don't want to diminish that influence, I don't know if I will write specifically about members of my family. I guess I was looking at it as a given that my family would be at the top of the list.

Just wanted to put that out there so I don't get comments about leaving out some of the most important people in my life. I also didn't want to offend those important people because I left them out. Know that you are at the top, now and always, in such a way that nothing even needs to be written.

Peace.

The Bishop

Phil had left home in the Washington D.C. area in his early teens and traveled around the country from party to party. He knew what it meant to be homeless and that the dumpsters outside of Dunkin’ Donuts always held a good chance for food. He was an alcoholic and, at one point in his life, had been addicted to drugs as well. He worked on riverboats mostly in the Midwest. Just about anywhere you had traveled or were going to visit; Phil had a great story about that place.

At some point, Phil’s life took a drastic turn. He became a follower of Jesus. The drinking and the drugs stopped. He married the love of his life, an equally amazing woman named Dixie. He had three kids who loved their father deeply. He finally settled in a medium sized town in Missouri and eventually became involved in a church I attended. This is where Phil entered my life.

I was working as a youth pastor at the time and Phil came on staff at the church as a janitor. I suppose this is where our friendship really started and began to grow. Phil was as devoted to God as a person could be and as irreverent as anyone I have ever met. He was phenomenally quick-witted and loved any humor involving bodily functions. For a youth Christmas party once, I asked him to be interviewed as Santa’s younger brother, Bear Claus. When asked how Santa got those reindeer to fly, he looked right at me and said “We’re all adults here, aren’t we?”. I yelled that we weren’t because I knew where he was going. He then proceeded to ask a room full of Junior High and High School church kids if the words “threat to castrate” meant anything. I thought one of our leaders was going to have a nervous breakdown on the spot.

Phil could carry on a conversation with a homeless man about the trials of not having a place to live and the next minute, he could be conversing with the president of a bank about the highs and lows of investing. He was a voracious reader. His favorite book was about a snake handling church in Alabama. He loved college basketball and was constantly mystified by his beloved Missouri Tigers. He referred to himself as “The Bishop” because the real power in the church resided in the maintenance department. When he had a personal prayer time, he talked to angels, which was his code for “I fell asleep”.

Aside from all the life and laughter, the most profound thing that Phil brought to those around him was a sense of God’s grace. He was a man who had experienced, and continued to live in, the expansive, unending grace of God. I think it was from this experience that Phil was able to give grace to others. He was so non-judgmental and kind to everyone he met. He was not about the cheap grace that says everyone is ok, but there was a deep sense of gratitude and knowledge that God’s mercies really are new every morning.

My friend, The Bishop, died almost six years ago this spring. He left behind his wife and three kids and innumerable people who loved him. He can still make me laugh out loud when I think of him and now, writing this in a coffee shop, I am fighting tears. I am so grateful that God brought this man into my life to show me in a tangible way what grace looks like. My prayer is that everyone finds someone like the Bishop in their life at some point and that I can be a little like him when I grow up.

Peace.